At least they gave me something to do today. Narcie’s van had two recalls on it, plus it needed a few other maintenance issues done. So what was supposed to be a 2 hour-max visit to the car dealership ended up lasting all day – all of which had me feeling a little out of the loop on the home front. I know I bothered them all, calling to see if they heard anything from the doctor. Waiting sucks! I’m trying to prayer-walk like I do in Columbia and do what Cindy always says, “Turn your worries into prayers.” I did that in the parking lot at the car dealership and that was fine except for the salespersons.
This in-between time is such a funky place. You’re not sure if you should plan the next day or the next week because you don’t know what it may hold in store, but, hey, c’est la vie, n’est pas? (That’s life, isn’t it?), but in this case I’m starting to feel more like saying, c’est la guerre, n’est pas? (That’s war, isn’t it?). The battle rages in my heart between the unanswered what-if’s and the answer that I know by faith, “All things work together for the good of those who love God… and nothing in all creation will separate me from God’s love” (Romans 8). Well, yeah, I believe this. I know what Good Friday feels like and I know Sunday is coming, but this is Holy Saturday, the day between the crucifixion and Easter’s glory. What do you do with Holy Saturday? How do I handle this?
Maybe I’ve been missing some of Easter’s power because I’ve skipped too quickly from Good Friday’s gloom to Easter Sunday’s resurrection. I’ve been guilty in too many churches of scheduling Easter Egg Hunts on Holy Saturday. Boy, does that seem pretty stupid right now. Maybe if I had been more able to sit in the stark silent reality of “no news yet” on Holy Saturday I would have been better prepared for this surreal experience. I’ve been guilty of glossing over God’s times of silence and jumping ahead to God’s shouts of “Victory!” Why? Because it’s easier to hear a trumpet than the sound of crickets. One says, “Hop to” and the other lulls you into silent oblivion. Silence and death are both anathema to being Christian, right?
Wrong. God’s silence is a megaphone. Doubt is the handmaiden of faith, not its enemy. Holy Saturday confirms Easter rather than denies it. If Jesus’ death weren’t a real death, and if Jesus didn’t really descend to the dead, then Easter ain’t much, is it? Next year Holy Saturday is going to a be observed with a fitting amount of reverent anxiety so that Easter glory might be better appreciated. That’s where I am tonight – pondering, praying, waiting – not in vain, but it isn’t Easter yet.