The Night Before


Man, This night before your daughter has brain surgery is not easy. I am honestly caught between being freaked out wired with my palms itching and sensing non-existent fire ants crawling on my feet. My spirit is frazzled though I’ve been calling on the Lord all day for days – should have been doing that a little more, but, as they say, “There are no atheists in foxholes,” better late than never.

I really want to thank all of you for your thoughts and prayers for Narcie. Her surgery has been moved up to 11:15 am Eastern tomorrow Friday June 11. Tomorrow is Cindy’s birthday and I know what she wants: She wants Narcie whole and well. Narcie had a good cell phone call from her doctor last night that she wrote about on her blog: I am going to try to blog my way through the surgery tomorrow or give you a recap when the doctor tells us the news and we get to see her.

I thought I knew what parent’s went through over these 30+ years of ministry when they lost a child. I had no idea of the aching hole in your heart, the overwhelming anxiety, the way that every nerve ending is hanging out to be stepped on by the slightest thing. I just didn’t know it could be this bad.

It was good to be at annual conference with Narcie last night and the part of today that we were there. When a person is ordained as she and I have been, and even her brother, Josh, as a provisional member, your membership is transferred from your home church to the annual conference. Of course as P.K.’s (preacher’s kids) they have had many “home churches” and I have mine at Edgefield UMC in Edgefield, SC, and they have all been and are appreciated. But still the annual conference is our intersecting link, our lodestone for our heritage and hope. It literally becomes your home church. It certainly felt that way today. Every hug was a prayer. United Methodist Connectionalism is going to help save us as a denomination and Wesleyan Movement because it is a vehicle for the most powerful witness of grace that my family has ever experienced. I cannot imagine going through life without the Connection which is not at its best a top-down or bottom-up connection, but is a horizontal one where we let God’s Spirit flow through us as equal recipients of Jesus’ love.

Pray for us tonight that the nerves settle down and that Narcie gets restful restoring sleep; that Mike rests well and is a continuing strength to her; that Enoch & Evy don’t get scared because they sense something is wrong with Mommy; and that Cindy gets her birthday wish tomorrow: Narcie, alive and well.Thanks again,

2 thoughts on “The Night Before

  1. >Last night was a long night after a long day. I keep trying to stay strong in my faith statement, but the dark does seem to have negative effects – even in those who are strongest of faith (remember the garden of prayer the night Jesus was captured…)- so I just continue to pray.I know you don't really need to hear every health story of every life. You heart concern is on the one you're personally involved in, but as I "hear" Narcie's heart as she blogs through this journey, I can hear my own words as I faced disc, back and nerve problems when I was about Narcie's age. We fight so hard to be competent, strong women wearing so many hats as we walk through the day. When I found myself in a bed unable to walk, unable to care for myself – much less my child or my family – when I was required to let people I dind't even know care for my most intimate needs, God helped me to accept the grace exhibited to me way outside the boundaries of who I am. As Narcie says, it's hard to be on the accepting side when we see ourselves as the givers. I see Narcie allowing herself to accept the grace coming her way and she will be a better pastor, mother wife, daughter, sibling for it.We will all grow from this adventure (as hard as it is to go through it!!!) and arrive in a place we would never choose to travel so wrapped in the amazing love of God we'll be tasting and seeing heaven on earth. No of us are walking alone in this and praise God for that…Praying the family through this as yet unanswered day. Peace and grace!!Joanne

  2. >Tim, you are the one who taught me how to be a true Christian.I didn't really know how, because one of my parents had such a warped idea of true Christianity.Because of you I am active in my church and so much happier.Your family means so much to me,and I have,in recent days spent much time inprayer for Narcie and for all of you.I know that you and Cindy are so proud of her.I have read both blogs daily,and today I await news of Narcie's surgery.I know that God holds her in the palm of his hand.Ithank God that there are people in the world like you and Cindy and you children and their families.In prayer for Narcie and all of you'Ruth M.

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